Save-the-Dates: Etiquette Q&A

I am getting married in about a year. We are planning on sending the save the dates with Christmas cards as well. Since the majority of our guests will be out of towners, should I also send accomadation information along with it??

I have to change my wedding date due to the deployment of my future MIL. Glad to find a little note about this scenario in here, although I would like to know what to do to reassure guests more formally. I will call them, but as the wedding is now 6mo away instead of 2mo, it seems another save-the-date might be useful.

Erins785 - I plan on sending my Save-the-Date magnet with my Christmas card. The plan is to buy Christmas cards and put the Magnet inside the card.

I'm a little confused because we decided to get married in Las Vegas but its not until next September. The tricky thing is I don't think sending save the date cards in July will really give our families enough time to save I with thinking about sending them now that way they will have way more than enough saved.

lovelymissautumn - We sent out ours as magnets too. I wrote a little note on the back of each one, telling them we hope they can be part of our special day. Since the invitations will be more formal, I figured this was the perfect time to jot them an appreciative and warm note. Emily.bourque - have you thought about putting on a PO Box??

Our Save-the-dates are personalized postcards with our names, date, location, and website link. Online all guests will be able to find accommodation options, the story of us, registry and driving directions, etc. We're sending our May-wedding save-the-dates in November since I don't want them to be mixed in with holiday cards. Odds are they will just get thrown into the "incoming mail" pile instead of nicely placed on the refrigerator :)

Do Save the Dates have to have a return address? If so, who should it be from? My parents are paying for most of the wedding, but my fiances parents are making a large contribution as are we - who do you think should be on the return address?

i was thinking of also sending out my save the dates with my christmas card, or even as my christmas card. Any thoughts on how to do that? or ideas?

Ok, question: do you send anything with save-the-dates? My fiance and I just ordered ours and are planning on sending them out in early November. We did magnets...do we just put them in the envelope and send them off, or do we send anything else with it? Like accomodation information or our phone numbers/e-mail addresses, etc....?

So I will be sending out my Save the Dates very soon. The wedding will be on Martha's Vineyard where my family is from however we will have quite a few out of towners. What is the best way to include the accomodations for where the ceremony is as well as other options. I want to give enough time for guests to make plans.

Hello everyoney. To Kisha and TMarie granted this site says etiquettly speaking you should send the "save the date"s out six months before. I used to work at a print shop that specialized in wedding stationary. Our customers usually sent there "Save the Date"s out a year in advance. I think you have chosen a great time to send them out. They won't be to early or to late and it also gives time, that if they get sent back to you, you still have time to correct it and mail again.

Hi everyone...... to Kisha - I'm getting married Oct 2010 and still sending my save the dates with my Christmas cards....it may be a tad early according to etiquette, but I figured it's the best time. Not only do you save on postage, but also people will start getting new calendars for the new year, and what perfect time to send them! also, to Mila - I honestly don't think many people check wedding websites, but I still created one b/c it was fun!!! I figured the only "info" they probably would get off there would be your registry, but you'll find so many people will either ask you, or someone close to you for that info..... Good luck!!

Hey ladies :) I am thinking about giving out my save the dates with my Christmas cards. I am getting married in Sept 2010. Is that too early?

Hey ladies :) I am thinking about giving out my save the dates with my Christmas cards. I am getting married in Sept 2010. Is that too early?

Hi ladies.. what are your thoughts of having a wedding website? Do you think its necessary?

We are doing ours with our christmas cards too! We are getting married July 23rd 2010

We're getting married April 24, 2010 and we'll be sending them out in last weeks of September. Ours will have a little magnet on the back so they can leave it on the fridge and will contain our wedding website (a specialized website not on The Knot) to check out updates and my "Bridal Blog."

I'm getting married June 5, 2010, and we're sending them out with Christmas cards! Separate stationary and design, of course.

We plan to marry May 15, 2010 and I am sending the "save-the dates" either by the end of October or early November! I want to send them before the holidays!!

I'm getting married on May 8, 2010 and my saved the dates are going out end of October, beginning of November.

I'm getting married May 7, 2010 and I plan to send Save the Dates no later than the first week or two of October 2009.

My wedding is Jan 2010 and i'm just sending out the save-thedate this month

My wedding is April 17, 2010 and I'm sending save the dates out by October.

My wedding is May 29, 2010, and I plan to send my Save The Dates out in October. That's 8 months. Plenty of time.

My wedding is august 7 2010. I was also thinking to send my save-the-dates out in January so they don't get tossed with holiday cards/mail!

My wedding date is August 28th, 2010. I already had the save the dates and thank you notes made. They should arrive in the mail in a few days. Should I send out the ones to the guests that live out of the country soon? I can't even choose my wedding party until I know whether they can come or not.

my wedding is july 31, 2010, and my mom was trying to tell me to send them out now. (a bit too far out i think...) i was thinking january, after the holiday season (so it doesnt get thrown out with holiday mail) but maybe i should do early december so that people have enough time to plan (most guests will be OOT's)

My wedding is July 2010. Do you think November is too soon?

I'm the same as kccody, my wedding is in sept 2010 and i am sending mine out in January.

if we have a wedding web site, should we put that information on the save the date? I know on our site I'm going to put the hotel information, directions to the venue, ect. What do you think?

I am getting married is Islamorada, FL so I sent my 'Save the 'Date's' out 8 months prior so people can book their flights and we can try to book the hotel with just my guests!

I am getting married in another state...so ours our going on in December (instead of a xmas card) to give everyone time to book the hotel and flights at a good rate!

my wedding is june 2010 and my mom said send the date cards out in march. I think that is too late 4-5 months should be plenty of time

My wedding is September 2010. I'm sending mine out in January. New year, new calendar!

Ok, so we are having a "desitnation" wedding and have heard from many of my family they will not be able to attend. Do we still send them save-the-dates and invites? We have a limited number of people that are able to come (per the resort policy) and want to invite people we know will come versus inviting people who can't come and not inviting people who can. Any advice?

My Wedding is August 2010 too but I am not sending my Save the Dates til December and my Invitations in May

I agree with you LinJay.... My wedding is also in August of 2010 and I am planning on mailing mine out this September.

I agree with you LinJay.... My wedding is also in August of 2010 and I am planning on mailing mine out this September.

Does 6 months sound too late to send save the dates to anyone else? My wedding is 8/14/2010 but I have a decent amount of out of town guests...I figure the eatlier the better. Plus 6 months away would be too close to the holidays....

I made my own design in powerpoint (using a picture of us) and then uploaded it to vistaprints. I'm getting magnets that are 5.5 x 4 in. Search online for coupon codes too. I got 50% off, so for 100 save the dates I paid $49.99 + shipping!

I just ordered some announcements from Vistaprint.com I got the first 10 for free and was able to get 30 with matching envelopes for only $28! They are very cute and of great quality!! I combining my engagement announcements with the save the date. I figure it will save me time and money! But my wedding is in Sept. of 2010!!! Is that okay?

I just found really cute save the dates on clearance at Michael's- we're inserting a photo a friend of mine took of us on the Santa Monica Beach when we went for a visit, and simple information about our website, date, and city. The whole thing for 70 cards, not including the postage is 23 dollars!!! Saving a few bucks for the bar- whoo whoo!

Is it rude to only invite certain people to the reception and lots of people to the actual ceremony? We have a small budget but have a lot of friends we'd like to share the day with us.

Is it rude to only invite certain people to the reception and lots of people to the actual ceremony? We have a small budget but have a lot of friends we'd like to share the day with us.

Can we add a line like "Please let us know if you don't plan on attending" ? I have a large family and I think many of them might not attend, so I'd like to have a B-list of guests. Or will people get the hint and let me know? What have been your experiences?

I created a save the date card by using an engagement photo of my fiance and I and added the text over the picture. I had 500 postcard size cards printed for $60 at vistaprint.com (front and back printing, full color). They are beautiful and everyone has loved them. I just smile because I know how inexpensive they were. :)

I used magnetstreet. I customized the design to have my wedding colors and used a hilarious pic of my fiance and I at a friend's wedding where I caught the bouquet and he caught the garter. Because they are so personal to us, our friends think they're great, and stick them on the fridge. Also, about half of our guest list will have to fly to our wedding, so we felt it was courteous to give them several months notice. The biggest benefit though was it forced my fiance and I to actually solidify the guest list, which we had been avoiding. Plus we have a "B-list" because our space can't accomodate everyone we want to include, so as we get early regrets, we can invite our B-list without them knowing they were on it!

To be green, and to save some green, my fiance and I have thought about emailing out our wedding website to our intended guests. Is this ok etiquette-wise?

We sent out magnets also. We found magnetic photo sheets and created our own design. We made them business card size and then attached them to large gift tag shaped cardstock. One of the girls from my wedding party also helped me tie sheer ribbon in my wedding colors to the tips.

Are you supposed to put the location of the ceremony or the reception? Or both?

if you don't send save-the-dates, how do you know who will rsvp?

I also used magnetstreet.com. I meant to order magnets but made mistake and just ordered the cards without magnets on the back, but they still look great. They are 3.5 by 5.5 so they are a nice size.

I ordered mine from MagnetStreet.com They have different sizes and lots of different designs, some of which you can customize with colors & fonts and such. They also have non-magnet choices and some have matching invites. I chose the 3.5 x 4" magnets, they started at $1.99 each for 50 and got less expensive with higher quantities.

I too used Vistaprint.com. I used one of their Save The Date templates and uploaded our photo. I got the back printed as well and wrote a short story of how we met. I made 75 in English and 25 in Spanish for my Non-English speaking guests. I am thrilled they look amazing, and they were CHEAP!

I got postcards made with our engagement photos on them (a different one for every card!) at Moo.com- it was 40$ for 60. Everybody liked them cause, and a lot of people even framed them afterwards for the photo! It was nice cause it gave us just enough room for our message and to include our wedding website information- plus we saved on envelopes!

123print.com does matching magnets and postcards. Since I am doing a destination wedding, I wanted the magnets for the Travel Agents number and the postcard so they can give me a heads up if they are attending or if it is not a possibility.

I bought Avery business card magnets at office max and downloaded Avery Design Pro for the computer for free. Cost - $25 for about 100 magnets.

We went to OvernightPrints.com and got 100 double sided glossy postcards for about $30. Single sided was only $10 I think. The best part was that we got to upload our own photos and designs. Good luck ladies!

I went to Vistaprint.com and got 100 postcards, they were free, I only had to pay shipping and that only cost $10.16 and they will be here in about 2 weeks. and since they are postcards, it saves on postage and buying envelopes. It's worth checking out. You can upgrade them for full color on the backside for a couple extra bucks. Not a bad deal. Thought I would pass it along.

Sammi, I think any magnet will be a printed paper on a magnet backing. I'm making my own. Magnet sheets for your printer are available in office supply stores. I'm doing a cute, very personalized layout on Printmaster. I saved so much doing it myself, I splurged on foil lined envelopes, also from the office supply store! And I may do personalized stamps. For 60 guests, I need only 25 cards, so I bought 2 packs of magnets for $10 each, and $5 on envelopes. (On sale for christmas time!) Plus, of course, ink used. Best of luck to you!

I ordered ours from agiftfulheart.com and they were pretty reasonable!

Does anyone have any advice on a save-the-date magnet that they have received and are pleased with? One of my old roommates used magnetstreetweddings.com and I loved the quality of her magnets, but they are the most expensive I have found! I started to order some that I thought were cute, and then I read that the magnets were paper attached to a magnetic backing and I then wasn't so sure... Help!

I decided on save the date MAGNETS! They can stick em on the fridge and remember from time to time. I am sending mine 1 year to the day ahead of time as some of the out of towners will be flying in from all over the world. Want to save $$$? This is what I did. Vistaprint.com has business cards and such. I ordered 200 magnets with my message on them (plenty of designs to choose from business card section) or upgrade for less than $10.00 to upload personal photo or design. With shipping it came to less than $60.00!!!! I will also be sending them to local family & friends as well.

Big Question: We're trying to limit the guest list - rather, trying to send out invites and hope that not everyone shows up. Could we put something on the save the date that would suggest the guest give us a heads up as to whether or not they will attend? Would this be terribly tacky? Is there a better way to do this??

Please Help!? Is it customary or do I need to send save-the-dates to my Vendors? I mean, they have my date locked in with the deposits the received, but is it necessary? Thank you!!

Question: do Save the Dates go to all guests, or only out-of-town guests we are inviting that are travelling and will need to make travel arrangements in advance? 90% of our guests are out of towner's, it would seem odd not to tell the other 10%...thoughts?

I plan to use our wedding website as a way to tell guests where we are registered (instead of including a registry card with any of the invitations) - so I'm putting the website address on the save-the-date.

mobambi- Our family decided (especially since we're paying for the wedding ourselves) that sending out a gift registry works with our engagement party since, by the time the bridal shower comes around, everything we need will have already been bought. I think if it feels ok with you, you should go for it, especially with those circumstances.

Pink I am thinking of sending out save the dates to include on there and point out the fact that no kids under 12 will be invited. I was thinking of saying something like "Reception for adults only" "No kids" I want to make it really clear due to the reception site being so small and limited.

Need your thoughts. Is it tacky to include registry cards in your save-the-date mailing? We live 1,000 miles from our home town. We are having a very small, intimate celebration in our home town near family and friends. Because of our age and location, I won't be having a bridal shower. After we got engaged, some family/friends have been saying they want to end us a gift. I thought this would be a way to give them an idea of what we need. What do you think?

I am having a December 2009 wedding and I plan on sending out my save the date notes in Feb or March of 2009. Lots of people go on tropical vacations at that time of year. I want to make sure my wedding is on their calendar when making vacation plans.